'The Simpsons' marathon on FXX: 15 hilarious traffic scenes from the first 25 seasons

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Homer Simpson: distracted driver.

(20th Century Fox)

Ex-cellent.

It has begun: The FXX cable network is airing all 552 episodes of "The Simpsons," the best television sitcom in the history of man beaming video signals into space.

Anyone who sits through just a couple yellow-skinned hours of the ultimate marathon (lasting 12 days!) will discover, the animated series created by Portland native Matt Groening has always been good for a traffic joke.

For those who aren't into binge watching through Labor Day, I've compiled 10 of my favorite commuting gags on "The Simpsons":

Homer drives with Google Glass: "Ack! Reality!"

"Marge vs. the Monorail," featuring the Conan O'Brien penned "Monorail Song."

Ah, getting back to nature. D'oh!

The Homer, the car of the future. Someone actually built it.

"Isn't that cute, a baby driving a car."

Looking for Lisa. Lisa gets lost after taking public transit to the museum.

Honk! "I'll get it!" Ode to the frazzled taxi mom (the gag starts at 2:21).

Half-Decent Proposal

"Oh. My. God! Tramampoline! Trabampoline!" For all of those aggressive drivers who think everyone on the road is going for the same parking spot, sold-out movie or ... used trampoline. As Homer rushes to claim a free trampoline he sees advertised in the newspaper, he knocks a random driver off the road, exclaiming, "Oh no you don't! That trampoline is mine!" (Sorry, but the "remix" of the scene below is the best version of the scene that I could find on YouTube.)

"Wow! A blue car!"

Homer takes a job as a long-haul trucker. Of course, some truck drivers weren't exactly laughing at this joke.

That new car smell.

Marge drives the new Canyonero in gridlock.

At a minute and 25 seconds into Season 21's "Rednecks and Broomsticks," the family tries to beat the traffic by leaving a ski resort early Sunday morning. When Homer hits gridlock around the first mountain-road bend and laments, "Oh, I hate traffic! The band and the phenomenon." That's followed by a hilarious riff on those backseat road-trip toys that start to drive parents into madness after the first five miles. Watch it on Hulu.

Homer sings "Cars" by Gary Numan.

"Brake My Wife, Please." The entire episode is one big take-off on distracted driving and America's sometimes unhealthy relationship with our automobiles. It includes some classic lines.

A Texas oilman asks what shouldn't be -- but probably is -- a rhetorical question: "Without oil you wouldn't have your fancy four-wheel drives. You don't want to go back to two-wheel drive do you?"

In a big box electronics store, the salesman asks Homer, "What is currently plugged into your car's cigarette lighter?"

Homer: "Uh, a lighter."

Salesman: "I weep for you."

Nothing beats the over-the-top commentary on distracted driving from 4:53 to 6:29. Homer drives while using an in-car deep fryer, watching TV, playing with a Lite-Brite and operating a fog machine. He then tries to fax an "SOS" using a dashboard fax machine as he drives off a pier. Not surprising, he loses his license after that.

Unfortunately, only a piece of it is available online.

Yes, as any faithful fan of the show knows, there are plenty of others. What did we miss? What's your favorite?

-- Joseph Rose

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